Reclaim your heart

We must realize that nothing happens without a purpose. Nothing. Not even broken hearts. Not even pain. Emotional pain warns us that we need to make an internal change. We need to detach. Pain is a form of forced detachment. The more dunya hurts us, the more we inevitable detach from it. The more we inevitably stop loving it.

Allah tells us in a very profound verse: ' Verily with hardship comes ease ' [94:5]

Growing up I used to think after hardship comes ease. In other words, I thought life was made up of good times and bad times. But that is not what the verse is saying. The verse is saying WITH hardship comes ease. The ease is the same time as the hardship. This means that nothing in this life is ever all bad/good. In every bad situation we're in, there is always something to be grateful for. The question is which do we choose to focus on? I think the trap we fall is into rooted in this false belief that this life can be perfectly good/bad. However that's not the nature of dunya. That's the nature of hereafter either Jannah perfectly good or Jahannam perfectly bad (may Allah protect us).

By not truly understand the reality, I myself would become consumed by the momentary circumstances of my life (whether good or bad). I experienced in its full intensity as if it was ultimate or would never end. The way I was feeling at the moment transformed the whole world and everything in it. If I was happy in that moment, past and present, near and far, the entire universe was good for that moment. As if perfection could exist here. And same thing happened with bad things. I could see nothing outside of it. Nothing else existed for that moment. If you wrong me today, it was because you no longer cared about me not because this was one moment string of infinite moments which happened to be tinted that way.

Perhaps this is the reason we can fall prey to the " I've never seen good from you " phenomenon which Prophet s.a.w referred to in his hadith. Perhaps some of us say or feel this way because at that moment, experientially we really haven't seen good because our feeling at that instant replaces, defines and becomes everything. Past and present becomes rolled up into one experiential moment.

Reclaim your heart, Yasmen Mogahed.

You are not broken

“From the perfection of Allah’s ihsan is that He allows His slave to taste the bitterness of the break before the sweetness of the mend. So He does not break his believing slave, except to mend him. And He does not withhold from him, except to give him. And He does not test him (with hardship) , except to cure him.” —  Ibn al-Qayyim [rahimahullah]

When you apply for a job, the manager will first give you a trial. He’ll interview you and be a little tricky. He’ll put you in unexpected scenarios and will assess your reaction. The whole point of this is to test your determination, your eagerness for the job, to determine whether you’re a strong, hard worker or if you’ll fallout at the first sign of difficulty.

The same thing goes when we apply for "Jannah". Although we’re already Muslim, there’s a point in our lives we become full time workers of Allah and begin to comply with all His rules properly. So when Allah sees that, He tests whether we are genuine or not. He puts us in strange situations to determine our reaction. He pressures us a little to see if we’re going to back out or break through. He twirls us in a few circles and we see things a little confusing, just to determine whether we are genuine and if we deserve it. When we pass those minor tests and small moments, Allah grants us ease.

 ' Verily, with hardship there is relief ' ( Qur’an 94:6 )

That is the promise of Allah. Often we get caught up in the temporary moments of world, and feel like everything is against us. The key is to remember Allah. Remember that these are just tribulations, and these too shall pass. Just like everything else in life that changes, our situation does too. Allah only intends to purify and cleanse us. He’s preparing us for something better. What we’re living in now are “peanuts” compared to the hereafter. Be God conscious, have faith, and don’t give up ! Success is just around the corner if we have patience. Let’s earn Jannah insyaAllah.

Behind my empty eyes

People said,

" I'm just protecting myself. I refuse to be hurt again.

Even if it means I have to be the one doing the hurting. " 

I presume that it may be all there. I guessed it's right about some things. But I can't bear to portray that position. I can only guess what it cost on myself  rather than being the person who hurt others, become the person getting hurt. 

I want to inspire people, I want someone to look at me and say because of you "I didn't give up" . 

A lonely girl,

With her vacant stares,

Screaming in silence,

But nobody cares.

Her pain goes unnoticed,

No one can tell,

She smiles like an angel,

But she's living through scars.

Her eyes blink with madness,

She close her own heart,

Her sad little smile,

Fades and grow thin.

Scars on her body,

Scars on her soul,

This hateful world,

Has taken its toll.

Ceased to think as wet behind the ears transmuted into passion ? Or do I need to keep swapping all memories. Shouldn't I? Learn to survive. Nothing loath to believe then regret than doubt then regret, I guess